two

If it weren't for being in class, I would really want to bluntly tell him to get lost, but recalling that he didn't report to the class supervisor about my skipping class for three days last time, I have no choice but to swallow my anger and not hold it against him

Startled by him, I let out a small gasp. The teacher at the podium shot me a disapproving glance, which I immediately redirected to the timid class monitor: "What does it have to do with you! You just had a breakup!"

Regardless of the circumstances, I must repay this favor he has done for me. Since I didn't spend any money on the phone repair, I will use this money to treat him to a meal

I stared at him, really wanting to ask their store manager why such an employee has not yet been dismissed

Unexpectedly, Yuan Zuyu is not someone who takes advantage of others' misfortunes. Sitting by the window on the second floor of McDonald's, each of us has a hamburger; his drink is a medium Coke with ice, while mine is hot chocolate

If I do not get up now, I fear I will burst into tears in front of everyone. I truly cannot afford to lose face, so I hurriedly stood up and stumbled out. As I was leaving, I did not even have the chance to say "goodbye".

In fact, we all know that this is just a joke of his, but perhaps I have entered menopause several decades early, as I not only do not find it funny, but am rather angry: "Rest assured, I will never marry you even in death!"

Sitting in the private room of the karaoke bar, I made an effort to appear more sociable, so when Lin Muse and Jun Liang were competing to choose songs, I pretended to want to join in as well. However, the enthusiasm I feigned was fundamentally different from genuine enthusiasm. Eventually, I felt so hypocritical that I moved over and plopped down next to Ci Yuan.

Therefore, I would rather never have it at all

Do you understand that feeling

It was originally the case, since you asked him to send that girl back, it indicates that you trust him. If you do not trust him, then why pretend? Is the act of saying one thing while meaning another really that amusing?

It resembles a beautiful fruit, which, when peeled layer by layer, gradually reveals its ugly core

The reflection of myself in the mirror appears uncertain, as if a thin layer of mist has shrouded my once bright pupils

During class, I was absentmindedly drawing Crayon Shin-chan's bottom in my book when suddenly a deep-voiced boy leaned in close to my ear and said, "Song Chuwei, have you experienced a breakup?"

Only on that one day, after that day, she walked among the crowd still with the demeanor of a queen looking down upon all beings, only occasionally relaxing a bit when she was with me

Out of shame and shyness, I turned my back to Ciyuan, so I did not see the fleeting panic that crossed his face.

Gu Ci Yuan pulled me aside and asked, "What has been going on with you lately?"

I am truly afraid that as soon as I open my mouth, it will lead to a flood of emotions.

He couldn't help but quietly ask me: "Chuwi, what is wrong with you?"

At that time, my greatest dream was not to become a scientist, but to...! ... be that little chubby one!

Five people were gathered around a table, enjoying their meal. Lin Muse loved salmon sashimi the most, while Du Xun helped Jun Liang peel the shell of the steamed hairy crab. Extremely fond of grilled fish, Gu Ciyuan turned his face to discover that aside from mashing the hawthorn cake in front of me into a pulp, I had made no contributions whatsoever

Well, since he has spoken, I have nothing more to say

My face is reflected in his pupils, this is the boy I deeply love

Lin Muse held my arm: "Now that we have reconciled, let's gather for a meal again before your winter break, and invite Jun Liang as well"

Years later, sitting in McDonald's, I said seriously to Yuan Zuyue, choosing to avoid the display window may not be due to a dislike for the items inside, but rather because one cannot afford them

However, this Ferrero is different; it melts layer by layer between the lips and teeth, rich and smooth, with a crunchy hazelnut at its core

There is no me in that laughter

I nodded, unsure of the expression on my face. I believe we all understand in our hearts that day is too far, too far...

Du Xun smiled and said, "It's better if you don't come. I'm afraid you might bring a liquefied gas cylinder with you."

However, there are three things in this world that cannot be concealed: a cough, poverty, and love

She leaned her head against my shoulder, her voice tinged with an unmistakable weariness: "Chuwi, do you think that some masks, if worn for too long, might become the face?"

Some masks, after being worn for a long time, truly become impossible to remove

How I wish to exchange lives with him, simply because he gets to enjoy such delicious Ferrero every day

Under the glaring lights, I was horrified to see Du Xun, who was dumbfounded, and beside him stood a girl with tears streaming down her face—she was not Jun Liang

I, who was originally arrogant and overbearing, was rendered speechless by his two questions

Although the passage of time is unpredictable, in that moment, I was utterly certain

I was taken aback; that voice was not mine. When I looked up, I saw that the person standing in front of me had slightly red eyes. For some reason, I suddenly felt like crying again

Seeing the atmosphere so awkward, I also felt quite embarrassed. After stabilizing my emotions, I hardly dared to look at Ci Yuan's expression, and could only timidly lower my head and say softly, "I'm sorry, I need to go to the restroom."

I kept my word; since my phone was broken and unusable, I didn't go for lunch and stood at the entrance of the boys' dormitory waiting for Gu Ciyuan. When I saw him walking towards me from a distance, I was so nervous that my whole body trembled

I finally found the opportunity for revenge, my face expressionless, and without saying a word, I picked up that asparagus and threw it to the ground

He turned his face and suddenly broke into a mischievous smile: "I told him, just do me a favor, you are my girl."

Our private room is at the end of the corridor, near the emergency exit. Before entering, I vaguely heard a heated argument in the dark stairwell. Out of boredom, I surprisingly pulled Ziyuan along to listen.

I nodded my thanks to the young man who helped me fix my phone, much like a chick pecking at grains. He wore a teasing expression and said, "It's nothing, it's nothing, it's what I should do..." while simultaneously exchanging glances with Yuan Zuyu.

As soon as the words were spoken, the smile on Gu Ciyuan's face seemed to be instantly frozen, and the three people beside him also displayed awkward expressions, leaving everyone momentarily at a loss for words

A small voice deep within is asking, Song Chuwei, are you happy

In this regard, it is indeed reasonable and justifiable

In the bathroom, I splashed my face with cold water and raised my head to gaze at myself in the mirror

If he were to propose to me at this moment, I would absolutely marry him

In fact, when he pulled open the glass door of McDonald's, I had already changed my perception of him. So, sitting down face to face and taking a closer look at him, I surprisingly found that this guy is actually quite handsome

I do not know how to tell him that, in fact, after witnessing the changes in Junliang's family, I have become much more understanding than before. Now, I rarely complain about life; as long as I can see him every day, and when I feel unhappy, just thinking that there is still someone like him makes me feel very happy.

Seeing him lower his head and close the private room door, I genuinely felt happy for Junliang

I am truly moved; looking at his silhouette, I feel that if I do not leave now, my conscience might compel me to tell him: Tang Yuanyuan is having an affair behind your back

After fixing my phone, Yuan Zuyu stretched and said, "Alright, I just finished work too, let's go together"

When I made this suggestion, he did not even pretend to be modest, displaying a demeanor of a gentleman with complete openness, his face inscribed with four characters: deserving of it without shame

I feel a bit guilty about my discovery, considering I have a very handsome boyfriend! How can I think other guys are attractive? If Gu Ciyuan were to come and tell me he thinks some girl is pretty, I would definitely want to strangle him immediately

In fact, I do not wish to eat at the buffet, but seeing their enthusiasm, I do not want to say anything to dampen their spirits

I stared at him in confusion, ah, what is wrong with me? I did not realize that I was lost in thought. The next moment, I saw him frown, with something indescribable in his eyes, as if he were impatient, yet also trying hard to restrain his impatience

He leaned down and whispered in my ear, "Don't worry, I won't seek anyone else. You should also be a little obedient and - picture - book

They are all laughing

Seeing Junliang truly angry, Gu Ciyuan and I could only awkwardly gather together for a meal. However, this meal was extremely unpleasant, as he didn't even pick up his chopsticks for the dishes I ordered

Lian Junliang did not see through this point, yet it was unexpectedly revealed by this chance acquaintance, Yuan Zuyu

You always suspect that one day you will lose it, you always feel that the kite string in your hand may break at any moment

Yuan Zuyue directly asked me, since this relationship makes you feel so insecure, why do you still choose to be with him?

Because of love

I silently pretended to tidy up the table, trying to minimize my presence, so that the mother and daughter could chat without any reservations. However, as they paused along the way, the unfamiliarity and politeness in their words made even me, as an observer, feel a pang of sadness.

After Junliang finished that sentence, the atmosphere became a bit awkward. Her mother hesitated for a long time before turning around and calling out to me.

I took a glance at Lin Muse and Jun Liang, who were singing passionately, and feeling that my own voice was not worthy of such a performance, I agreed.

I looked at the sharply defined face of the young boy before me and smiled quietly

However, when I turned to look at Yuan Zuyu, he also had an expression of innocence on his face

Sitting on the sofa in the hall, at first, none of us spoke, but we simultaneously recalled that night of the graduation celebration. Ciyuan gently ruffled my hair and said, "Chuwi, do you know? The moment I feel the happiest every day is when I send you a text message saying goodnight before going to bed, even though you rarely reply to me."

She was convinced that I would choose to protect myself and that I would not tell Liang Zheng about what I saw and heard that day! Sitting on the bus, I thought with resentment: In this world, once a person loses their sense of shame, they can do anything better than others!

When I was in the third grade of elementary school, there was a chubby boy in my class whose father was the manager of a food company. He often brought him snacks that seemed lofty and unattainable to us peers.

Seeing that I remained silent, he mistakenly thought I was in agreement and earnestly began to share his insights on relationships: "In this world, there are no two people who are perfectly in sync; no one is born for the sake of another. There is always a process of adjustment... Of course, Yuan Yuan and I are exceptions. We have never quarreled. When she is unhappy, I give in a little; when I am unhappy, she allows me time to calm down. Therefore, we have always gotten along very well..."

I originally thought that Su Junliang would become a despondent person from then on, however, I was mistaken

"Yes, I deserve it," I said, suppressing my tears.

Lin Musuo came straight to the point: "I heard that you have had some unpleasant incidents recently, and I am here to see if there is anything I can assist with"

Yuan Zuyue's method of eating a hamburger is different from ours; he first eats the middle layer of meat, and then he nibbles on the two pieces of bread. I frowned as I watched him, truly unable to understand his way of eating

He seemed quite unconcerned, and after finishing, he began to gossip: "Why were you two arguing that day?"

What should I do? What can I do?

This is the first time I have been so candid; the love that Gu Ciyuan has given me has always been an unbearable luxury in my youth

So, I am indeed such a shameless person who is strict with others but lenient with myself

Junliang did not go to see off the plane, but that afternoon we all did not attend class

Du Xun is different from Ci Yuan. Ci Yuan always has a cheerful smile on his face, and his features are always filled with a sunny and festive aura. In contrast, Du Xun is always rather subdued; even when he smiles, it is extremely reserved. I once privately told Jun Liang that I think Du Xun is the kind of person who, even if he were about to faint, would first look for a clean place.

Seeing Lin Muse again, my expression was quite unnatural

Tang Yuanyuan, sitting next to Liang Zheng, also glanced at me. However, after just a brief exchange of glances, she hurriedly turned her face away.

Recalling how disheveled I looked that day, all seen by him, I just want to crash my head against something, or perhaps let him do the same.

Sitting on a wooden bench in the square, each of us holding a cup of steaming grapefruit tea, she suddenly said something I couldn't understand: "Since the age of sixteen, I have felt nauseous at the sight of ginger milk.

In the early hours, sometimes standing by the roadside watching the ebb and flow of people, I feel that the city is even more desolate than the desert. Everyone is so close to each other, yet completely unaware of each other's thoughts. It is so noisy, with so many people talking, yet no one is truly listening.

Suddenly, I let out a sigh in my heart, Gu Ciyuan, over the years, the one closest to me has been you, and the one farthest from me has also been you

One sentence made me almost spit out the chocolate in my mouth; this person is really quite gossipy! Why doesn't he become a paparazzo? Isn't it much more interesting to pry into the private lives of celebrities than to delve into the romantic life of an ordinary person like me?

I quietly rested on his lap, saying nothing at all

However, in fact, there is really nothing that cannot be said, and no disgrace that cannot be revealed. Thinking this way, I poured out everything about the matter to Yuan Zuyu as if I were emptying beans from a bamboo tube.

Whenever I find myself in an awkward situation, I tend to lower my head and gaze at the ground beneath my feet. As a result, I completely miss the subtle expressions on Gu Ciyuan's face and the profound meanings in Lin Muse's eyes.

The technician appeared at the appropriate time, holding a mobile phone, and said to me: "This is man-made damage, right? It is not covered under warranty. If you insist on having it repaired, there will be an additional charge. What do you want to do?"

This discovery left me suddenly feeling as if I had fallen into an ice cellar.

She reached out and hit me, her face full of disdain: "Your QQ signature constantly says that Gu Ciyuan is a bastard; even a blind person can see that!"

The mother expressed her dissatisfaction with the dormitory environment, pointing out various flaws and things that did not sit well with her. In the end, her tone conveyed genuine concern: "Junliang, why not consider renting an apartment to live in"

Seeing the confusion on my face, she smiled again

The more one tries to bury it, the more it becomes evident.

Perhaps it is because he has achieved everything effortlessly that he is very generous towards us classmates, often bringing delicious food from home to share with everyone at school

Junliang's mother completed all the formalities and visited her at school before going abroad. At that moment, when I opened the dormitory door, I was momentarily stunned. Junliang had a calm yet distant expression on her face, despite the tears welling up in her mother's eyes.

But an illusion is ultimately an illusion, she sighed deeply: "Chuwi, from now on you and Junliang must take care of each other, and if you have the opportunity, come and visit Auntie."

"Chuwi, I am sorry." He repeated it again

Without me saying anything, he would understand my meaning just by standing here. I bit my lip and scolded myself in my heart, "You are being mute, quickly say sorry"

However, I could not clearly articulate the reason, so the next time the chubby boy shared with everyone, I did not reach out to take it

Even if one day you truly obtain such a thing, your feelings will not be merely of satisfaction and joy; within that joy and satisfaction, there will always be a mixture of anxiety and the fear of loss.

I am fortunate that there is still Du Xun; otherwise, what would happen to the poor Jun Liang

In a magnificent glass display window, you see something you like very much, beautiful, exquisite, and expensive

Based on my understanding of her, this question should serve as a prelude to what she is about to say next. However, the other three individuals surprisingly pondered this hypothetical scenario seriously. Junliang considered it for a moment and smiled as she asked Du Xun: "If in the future you were to marry someone else, would you want me to attend?"

I was taken aback, thinking it was all over; had I known earlier, it would have been better to pay for the repair costs!

Taking two steps forward, I heard Lin Muse's loud and cheerful voice behind me saying: "On the day I received the invitation, I called him and said, 'I've already prepared the wreath, I absolutely do not want to attend your wedding, I only want to attend your funeral..."

Gu Ciyuan also cooperatively said to me: "If you are to get married, do not marry anyone else, and even more so, do not marry me"

I saw someone come in with an invoice to repair a phone. Yuan Zuyu pretended to be very enthusiastic and poured me a cup of water in a disposable paper cup, then leaned over and asked in a meddlesome manner: "Haven't you reconciled yet?"

He looked at me proudly and said: "I haven't experienced a breakup; I'm doing great with Tang Yuanyuan. But you, why don't you take a look in the mirror? You look like a storm cloud!"

His eyes were fixed on the screen, yet his hand reached over to wrap around my shoulder. I was effortlessly pulled into his embrace, and the familiar scent on him calmed all my previous restlessness. I held his hand, and amidst the loud, booming music, I could hear my own heartbeat.

When I grew up, I explained to myself that it stemmed from a kind of pride of the poor, but at that time, I was simply thinking in a very pure way that what I had eaten today might not be available tomorrow

Jun Liang smiled slightly: "Mom, I am not as precious as you think. Everyone can stay, so why can't I?"

This time, it really escalated. In the next moment, Gu Ciyuan stood up with a pale face and said to Jun Liang and Du Xun, "I can't eat anymore," before throwing down his chopsticks and leaving. I didn't lift my head even after his figure disappeared; my eyes were fixed on the innocent asparagus on the ground, and the surging bitterness in my heart overwhelmed me like a tide.

I reached out and pulled him closer, burying my face in his thick coat, and he gently stroked my head as if he were petting his golden retriever at home

I am sorry

Over the years, the one closest to me is you, and the one farthest from me is also you

As I wiped my tears and snot on his clothes, I thought to myself, in fact, Ci Yuan is truly wonderful, I want to cook red beans for him over a gentle flame and watch the slow flow of water side by side

This is the feeling, do you understand

But perhaps it is precisely because his smile is so rare that it makes people feel even warmer

Seeing that I did not respond, he presumptuously concluded that his assumption was correct: "Forget it, let's find another one. I see that you are not unattractive, so you should not be unwanted."

In the following week, no matter how Junliang and Du Xun tried to mediate, both my and Gu Ciyuan's behaviors were identical. When he invited me to dinner, I would avoid it; when I invited him, he would decline. The situation escalated to the point where Junliang became furious: "Damn it, such a big issue has arisen in my family, and I still have to comfort you two, right!"

It is a small round ball wrapped in golden foil, unlike the cheap chocolates found in school vending machines, which are hard and only offer sweetness when bitten into

I was already feeling aggrieved and was so angry that I almost left in a huff. Du Xun desperately held me back and kept signaling to Gu Ciyuan. Only then did he reluctantly place a piece of asparagus into my bowl

Du Xun took the opportunity to go to the supermarket to buy snacks and drinks while Jun Liang was competing with Lin Mu Se for the wheat. I originally wanted to ask Ci Yuan to go along, but Du Xun patted my shoulder, smiled, and indicated that it was unnecessary.

"Hey, how are you speaking like that!" I bit into the hamburger with great dissatisfaction, the force of my chewing made Yuan Zuyu shiver.

Since being together with Gu Ciyuan, although there have been disputes, frictions, and conflicts, our feelings have deepened day by day with the passage of time and the change of seasons

I truly disdain such lecherous individuals

Gradually, I came to understand the meaning of the words she spoke

I clearly remember that the first time I tasted Ferrero was from this little chubby one

Watching Liang Zheng's self-satisfied account, the feeling of sorrow within me intensified. I wanted to compare myself to him; in fact, I consider myself relatively fortunate. Gu Ci Yuan did not do anything to betray me... This time, I indeed may have overreacted... As for Liang Zheng... He surely does not know that during the time he was feeling down, when Tang Yuan Yuan was being considerate and allowing him to "calm down alone," there was another person shouldering the responsibility of taking care of his girlfriend.

Oh... he casually glanced at a hot girl walking past him. In the cold winter, she was surprisingly only wearing a pair of black stockings

In order to promptly respond to external communications, I skipped my afternoon class and took the invoice to get my phone repaired. After the teacher finished taking attendance, I was just about to sneak out the back door when I accidentally startled Liang Zheng again, but this time he chose to turn a blind eye.

Although there are times when I am so angry that I could almost kill him, for all the other times except for those "sometimes," I only want to love him well

It was only after my conversation with Yuan Zuyu that I realized I am such a peculiar person: the more I care, the more I feel the need to act as if I do not care.

Suddenly, I felt dizzy, lightheaded, experienced auditory hallucinations, had blurred vision, suffered from dry mouth and throat, and felt as if my lungs were burning

In fact, I am really not accustomed to him saying such things; whenever he does, I feel an overwhelming urge to cry, which is quite embarrassing

If I had a way, I would certainly dig a time tunnel back to that night, grab that neurotic Song Chuwei, and slap her twice to wake her up: Don't fall!

You can only stand across the street, silently glancing at it before walking away, and from that moment on, in order to avoid seeing it, you will choose to take a detour

Perhaps I have truly overestimated my acting skills. When I thought that only Junliang knew I was unhappy, the class leader Liang Zheng also came to offer warmth to the classmates

I hurried over and respectfully waited for her instructions. She reached out and touched my head, just as she had many years ago when I first went home for dinner with Junliang. In that instant, I felt a sense of time reversing.

Yes, what I have been unwilling to admit in my heart is that on that night, I indeed tested Gu Ciyuan using Lin Muse.

I do not know how I walked out of the bathroom and returned to my original position. Their voices were faint and distant, until Junliang pinched me hard, and I finally awakened from this dazed state. The faces of everyone around me seemed to be separated by a great distance.

Jun Liang also put down his chopsticks and sighed deeply: "Chuwu has already told us about the situation. That night, his phone ran out of battery. After sending Lin Muse to her destination, he couldn't find you. After returning to the dormitory to charge his phone, he tried to call you again, but it was still unreachable. He waited for you at the apartment entrance for over an hour. I told him that you accidentally broke your phone... Originally, if we both took a step back, had this meal, it would have been over. Why do you have to make it so complicated?"

I remain completely still and silent; to be frank, I am truly at a loss for words

Upon hearing this, I immediately raised my head and looked at her with suspicion: "Have you heard? Who did you hear it from?"

Seeing Yuan Zuyu make a "V" gesture at me, I, a mere commoner, instantly and effortlessly abandoned my original stance: in fact, this little rascal... is not so unpleasant after all

Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of Tang Yuanyuan casting a cold glance at them, a look filled with utter disdain. However, I believe that within this disdain, there might also be a hint of jealousy.

I do not know whether it is me or Ci Yuan, but I accidentally touched the touch delay switch on the wall, and the light turned on suddenly

In fact, it has only been a short span of two or three days, yet upon meeting again, the two individuals experience a sense of disconnection as if they have been separated for an eternity

Perhaps it was my pitiful appearance that moved Yuan Zuyu, this beast in human clothing. I do not know what he whispered to that colleague, but the young man cast a complicated glance at me before silently turning away to look for parts and tools.

However, I feel embarrassed to say these words in front of Yuan Zuyu, and I am even hesitant to say them in front of Jun Liang or Gu Ciyuan himself. Shen Yan is right; my concern for face will eventually lead to my downfall.

When the class bell rang, Liang Zheng still wanted to continue advising me, but I decisively interrupted him: "Alright, I will go apologize to him."

After listening, he looked up to the sky and laughed three times, saying: "How could your boyfriend be with such a brainless girl like you!"

Yes, what is wrong with me? ... I also want to ask him: why is it that now, whenever I see you, I inexplicably feel like crying...

Is the sense of satisfaction for humanity derived solely from comparisons with those who are less fortunate than themselves

After leaving McDonald's, Yuan Zuyue accompanied me to the bus station. Suddenly, I thought of something: "What did you say to your colleague? Why is he willing to help me fix my phone for free?"

The cluttered thoughts made me appear burdened with worries, and Ci Yuan pulled me up: "Let's go out for some fresh air."

Lin Musuo asked us with great enthusiasm: "If your former boyfriends or girlfriends get married, would you attend their wedding?"